Friday, March 7, 2014

Distractions & the Dark Feminine

I launched a conversation about depression a few months ago asking this question: What if it’s not depression, as we’ve come to think of it, but rather a sign of our profound unhappiness and dissatisfaction?
The question demands we get honest.
Observing my own life, these are some of the things I’ve discovered to be true for me: I don’t enjoy cooking, I’d rather be brewing words on the page; I love good company and great conversation but I’m not interested in inviting you over for dinner; I resent any time I spend cleaning up after other people; I’m in love with irises but I don’t like to garden; and I love my husband but there are times when I like living alone.
As I write these things down, I break into a cold sweat imagining my mother might read this and wonder what the heck kind of daughter she has raised! (Hi mom … I know you’re here so bear with me.)
Over the years I’ve done a lot of work with a lot of people in the realm some call the Divine Feminine. The idea of the Divine Feminine continues to evolve over time. The latest incarnation is something like this: to bring the world back into balance (it’s out of balance because of male dominated ideas and practices based on separation and competition) we need to aspire to be more cooperative, creative, and caring. This is understood in the context of patriarchy, a cultural scaffold mostly generated by men with women’s collusion. And the Divine Feminine refers to an energy or a quality that is present in all human beings.With me so far?
Read the rest here

1 comment:

S.N.Grundy said...

I am so glad that someone is even addressing women and depression; though men suffer from it too. We all know and hopefully understand that there are many women suffering from depression, for many reasons. However, I like the angle of this story because it speaks to the very basic principles of why many women, especially Christians, struggle with being true to oneself, in the midst of a potentially unhappy existence.

Depending upon our upbringing, where we were raise, and our embedded religious beliefs, it is quite common for women to give more to others, than what we give to ourselves. Not only is this a living truth, it is an expectation. Unfortunately, in most cases, it takes a traumatic event or a health scare for women to move in a different direction.

Several years ago, I read a book by Teri Hatcher entitled "Burnt Toast." In her book, she talked about the idea of women settling for the "burnt piece of toast" while serving others the nice, soft, buttery pieces. Being very "religious" myself, at the time...that was my first discovery and inclination, that I actually had a choice in what I wanted and what I accepted, despite the popular beliefs. While it did not happen overnight, my transformation began at that moment.

Much to the article's point, taking the time to self-assess and pursuing self-actualization, are necessary and freeing acts. The bravery to be honest with oneself, ultimately contributes to overall happiness and increased self-confidence; obvious factors that deter depression and derail resentment.

Each week I consider a quote, idea or thought to encourage myself, as well as others. Today I will surely ponder this one: "The very thing I say I want, turns out, in fact, wants me." I thank the author for such relevant words.